Scenes We'd Like To See: Series 10, Episode 10
The following is a guide to the Scenes We'd Like To See topics and suggestions made in the tenth episode of the tenth series. Key * HD – Hugh Dennis * AP – Andy Parsons * EB – Ed Byrne * CA – Chris Addison * MJ – Milton Jones * HW – Holly Walsh Topics Bad Things To Say In A Job Interview AP - When I said I was a Yale student, I studied key-cutting at Mr. Minit. HD - Why do I- we- I- we- I- we- want this job? Don't tell him- I have to. CA - No, no, no, no. I applaud your policy of positive discrimination, and that's why I blacked up. HW - Um, can I just check? This office is more than 50 meters from a school? EB - What do you mean no experience? If being abducted by aliens isn't an experience, I don't know what is! HD - Well, yes, I would make the perfect train driver. I'm always late and I (crying) break down really easily. MJ - I think I make a very good diplomat. I'd like to live in Paris, with all the other Parisites. AP - What do I see myself doing in 5 year's time? Exactly the same, only on Dave! CA - Thank you for seeing me, I hope you don't mind if I stay sat down for a moment, I've got a little erection bubbling away. EB - NO! EMU! NO, EMU! NO! NO! NO! HW - What can I bring to this job? How about the photocopier from my last office? HD - Yes, well I'm, in spite of my lack of medical experience, I still think of... gynecology's a calling. AP - What are my weaknesses? Fat birds. Unlikely Things To Hear On A Consumer Programme CA - This week on Watchdog, another shower of gullible twats ask us to make sense of their piss poor decision making. AP - Welcome to Watchdog. Here's a dog. HD - But when he asked the cold callers for their identification, they shot Mr. Bin Laden with an AK-47. MJ - I would like to complain about the boomerang I bought. I threw it but it never came BACK! (falls on floor as if he got hit by something) EB - This week, we investigate bikini waxing strips: Are they just a ripoff? AP - Tonight, we're investigating fencing and why I got tickets for that instead of the 100-meters final, which was what I wanted. CA - Many of you who have bought death stars have e-mailed us complaining about the security problems with one of the exhaust fans. HW - Although Austin the butcher claims that his sausages are made of premium meat, we can reveal that's bollocks. HD - The cruise had a 1940s theme and Tom and Vera were delighted, until they were sunk by a U-boat in the North Atlantic. EB - I didn't asked for it, didn't ordered it, got it even if I didn't want it, and doesn't even work. We have some more views on the coalition after the break. CA - What was sold as a vibrator is clearly just a taser with a stale sausage attached to it. HD - But something was wrong with the car. The clock said 63,000 miles, while the milometer said quarter past three. MJ - I would like to complain about the sushi restaurant at Gatwick airport. There was nice big portions going round on the conveyor, but they do taste luggagey. AP - Dear Watchdog, I'm extremely pissed off with this product. I bought Just For Men, my wife used it, and now, I am gay. HD - Identity theft is on the increase. I'm Dara O'Briain. We work, so he doesn't have to. Category:Scenes We'd Like To See